Like I’ve noted before, there is a strange kinship between errors that, on the surface, seem to oppose one another. The antinomian is just as focused on the law as the legalist. One runs from the law, the other to the law, but for the sake of the law, they both do run.
The Lutheran and the Arminian have a strange kinship in regards to the sovereignty of God in salvation while they firmly deny the resemblance. Neither truly believes that God has the absolute freedom to choose who will be saved. Both believe it to be unjust and unfair for God to chose to show mercy on some and not others, to one degree or another. Whereas the Arminian applies this to all mankind, the Lutheran applies this to children. Both think they can do something to make God save someone. One calls sinners to the “altar” in the front of the church to make a decision while the other sprinkles water on a babies head. Both positions think that their actions will move God to save and both will call it grace. Both sides will get upset when you point out that this is a work, and both positions will say these things are done in faith. But when you boil it all down, making a decision is a work, and so is baptizing babies. What precedes faith will determine if you truly believe in grace. An odd couple.
The wreckage of decisional regeneration is no different than that of infant baptismal regeneration. In both instances a well meaning adult convinces a child that they are saved. The child takes their word for it and moves on, walking (or crawling) in darkness. A church full of false converts, nominal Christians who have taken the word of someone that they were baptized and believed the report that they repented of their sins and trusted in Christ. Do many later come to saving faith? Sure. Do many die in their sins trusting in the words of men assuring them that their decision saved them, or their baptism saved them? Sadly, yes.
Faith is substantive. True, living, God given faith awakens the dead spirit to life, opens the blind eyes to sight, and causes the dead sinner to see the kingdom of God and come to Jesus Christ. The Lutheran can parse words all day long, but an unconscious infant does not have faith, as faith is defined by the Bible (Hebrews 11:1). How many legs does a dog have if you call his tail a leg? He has four - calling a tail a leg doesn’t make it so. Redefining faith may help a well meaning parent or pastor to sleep at night, but it does not change God’s Word, nor does it regenerate the soul of the deceived.
This is an emotional issue, especially for parents of young children, like myself. If there were something I could do to save my children, I would do it - but it would do them no good to impose upon them a religious ritual that has no power to save and lie to them in order that I might feel better. The well meaning Arminian will do the same. They will ask the child if they love God and want to go to Heaven and then ask if they love Jesus and then tell them they are saved. This makes the parents rejoice, for a season, until they wonder why their teenager is cooking meth in the back yard instead of at Bible study.
My children are in God’s hands. Salvation is of the Lord. I tell my kids of the gospel daily. We have daily family worship and daily Bible reading. I pray for the salvation of my children. I do all that the Lord has required of me,all that I can do and their souls are in His hands - and there is no other place that I would rather they be. I desire nothing more than to see my children walk in the truth, but I cannot change the leopard's spots in family worship and only God’s grace can give a heart of flesh, faith, and true repentance. I preach the gospel, I call them to repentance - but their souls are not in my not in my hands, not in the hands of the church, but in the Hands of God.